Just trust me! There's a point!

UPDATE~~HEY MY PERFECT SPELLERS, I MISPELLED A GAZILLION WORDS AND NO BRILLIANT MIND NOTICED?

GOOD LORD.

PLEASE CALL ME ON CRAP LIKE THAT.

I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO WORK SO HARD FIXING MYSELF.

~

This is my life. Why? Who the hell knows, but this is my life. Horrible day at the park. I was late, first of all, then I lost it. I sad down and sobbed. Blogging about Hillary is one thing, accepting she's gone is another. Today I accepted she's gone and I buried my head in my hands and just let it go. She's gone. I still can't believe it.

I was trying to get home and had to get off the freeway (80) and take the back route because 80 was so jammed I wouldn't have made it home till Sunday. I was back in Carmichael and going through a 4 way stop when a car load of teens pulled in front of me. I'm pretty mellow about that sort of crap, but then they started mocking me. They gave me the finger, laughed a whole hell of a lot, kept turning around to mock me more, but I pretended not to notice. Stupid teens on a Friday evening. Let it go. But then they did something really stupid. I'll put up with a whole hell of a lot of crap, but not stupid. They began throwing trash out the window. Confettii I believe. Okay, Aunt Suzie's done. I reached for my phone which is now illegal in CA and dialed 911. You bet your ass I did!!! I swear to God this is what I got: "If this is an emergency, say one." I had no other option so said "One." A lovely lady came on the line and asked about my emergency. I informed her it wasn't really an emergency, but I didn't have the number for the Carmichael Sheriff's Dept. She informed me I was good to go and to spill my guts. So I did. I gave the license plate #, a vivid description of the maroon Saturn and the 5 assholes inside. She asked me my exact location so the police could find it. I said "I don't know sweetie!" Yup, I called her sweetie. "I'm at Manzanita and something. I don't know the cross street. Okay, the light just changed, I'll get it for you in a second. Oh, they just went into the Safeway parking lot. You'll find them there, but I'm going home. Good luck." Littering is a huge fine here. Almost $500. They may get away with what they did, but they will never forget me. Never. A police officer is going to come tap, tap tappin' on your door. I like that.

Change is good...

Sweet Pea

~

I'm late for the park, but decided to post in an effort to move along. Thanks to those of you who helped me with that hiccup. Trust me, your kind words mattered. I'll keep you informed. I'm off to the park and it's raining today so I don't know what to expect. Cross your fingers everyone shows up.

As I navigated the kitchen and feeding everyone this morning I asked myself why I blog? I concluded my blog is a journal. It is, isn't it? And somehow it helps me get through good times and bad. Do you agree?

Happy Friday,
XO

Hillary

I had her you know. I just couldn't keep her. Most of you are wondering what's been wrong the past week. So much, but one thing for sure is Hillary. She's missing. I walked out of the park today in tears. My darling friend comforted me. She's a mantenance worker and barely speaks English, but she knew and so she just hugged me. There we stood in the middle of Discovery Park just clinging to one another. I know Hillary isn't coming back. I know now. I gave her a week and that was almost too much time. I've known her for almost 2 years and she's a terrific mom. She would never, ever abandon her babies. One is missing, so I assume she was protecting him from the coyotes and lost her life (yes, I deal with coyotes). She left behind 5 babies. I walked out of the forest today in tears and I haven't stopped crying. Yup, a pink baseball cap is the best. I can pretend I'm normal if I just pull it low enough to hide my eyes, but dear friends know fake. They always know. What am I to do? I'll work it out. I always do, but right now it feels absolutely hopeless. I know it's not, but it feels heavy.

Life is so complicated.

XO

Obama in Raleigh, NC!!!

I was unable to find the Obama photo I'd uploaded so gave up.

Here honey.

One for you and one for me!

Alex honey, just amuse yourself because Aunt Suzy doesn't

have another white wicker chair!

~

HI DIANA AND ALEX!!!

I was just about to walk out the door to feed the ferals and noticed Obama is about to speak in Raleigh!!! I know you and the wee one are there baby. I hope you're having the time of your life and I hope Alex remembers. He will honey. You made the right choice. Take lots of photos in the event he doesn't!
~
I love you so much. Thanks for the wonderful conversation last night. I needed it probably more than you know. This country will move in the right direction on the 4th. I have to believe that. I also have to believe he'll be safe. Thank you for all you do for the Democratic Party and please make sure Mom knows how much I appreciate all she does for the Republican Party. Unfortunately I think she's gonna get burned this time!!! Thank God!!! Sorry Mommy!!! Better luck in 2012!
~
Love you guys so much,
Aunt Suzy XO
XO

My continuing love affair with the DMV...

If you see me tomorrow around 4:00pm on CNN, MSNBC, or your local news, this is what I'll be wearing. I figure if I'm going to be dragged out of the DMV in handcuffs, I'm doing in it style because I'm going to kill someone in that freakin' place and it's going to be the guy on that freakin' recording.

I have wasted almost an hour of my time trying to change my photo appointment tomorrow at 3:30 only to be disconnected 5 times. I'll be disconnected 5 times, but not 6, so when I called the 6th time I told my new recording friend with 6 billion freakin' options, "Don't you dare disconnect me." He replied "I'm sorry, I don't understand. I'll transfer you to a technician...click." That's it. I'm going to find him and wring his skinny little neck. Yup, the DMV is a government office and I assume assault on an official government recording is a federal offense. I'm going to the pokie. I'll smile for the cameras. I'll have my pink baseball cap on and you'll recognize me when I say, "Hey everybody!!!"

This is my cooling off period. So far it isn't working. I'm still pissed. God, I really do have to get a grip on relaxation. And no, I won't be wearing that tacky little number above. I have some degree of class, but it's fun to think I don't!!! Let me just say this, if I have to go to the DMV tomorrow to tell them I can't make my appointment because I'm out of town, I'm going to be very, very angry.

This is my story and I'm sticking to it.

XO

P.S. Visit Brian's (CSI's ) blog for some massive fun. No, you can't find his linky-dinky here because I'm still linkyless, but you can get there via Kylie, Cece, Mark, IV, etc. The options are many. Kylie and I got honorable mention as NERDS!!!! She's in red, I'm in green!!! Who knew?!!! Oh, forgot how simple it is to link. Sorry! What? I'm over taxed mentally and physically, cut me some slack.
http://stampfl.blogspot.com/

Good Morning! Enjoy.

This of course was not the post I intended to write, but my dear friend Fannie sent me a bunch of whoppers this morning and this is one:

The Silent Treatment

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, 'Please wake me at 5:00 AM.' He left it where he knew she would find it. The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, 'It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.'

One of the worst weeks of my life...

It's been a crazy year here at Rose Cottage and the last few weeks have been especially difficult, but the last two days almost take the cake. Oh wait, there's Wednesday! This one may be the best yes. I'm writing nervously waiting for the Vet to call.

~

After a very long, busy, exhausting Monday, with barely any sleep the night before, I was up by 2:35 am Tuesday because Newman was sick, then Picasso got sick, then all hell seemed to break loose in the house and I still had to get to the park, then get back home, clean the house because it looked like a hurricane struck after more than a week of being ill myself, and I was expecting guests: the heating and air expert and the guy from PG&E (Pacific Gas and Electric). Ugh.

Turned out the heating and air guy was terrific. We had a blast. He taught me a lot too. Yes, as you all know I love to learn. Well the loud noise from the heating system was a piece of roofing from the roofiing. Oh God that's too funny. Yup, $90 later the heating guy says, "Your roofing contractor should pay for this." I replied "You bet your ass he will." And he is. No way am I going to pay for a piece of the roof down the freakin' pipe to the heating system. Oh, and the heating expert had to clean up all the crap the roofers left all over the heating system as well. What a mess.

Then the guy from PG&E arrived about 7pm. Good lord, could you arrive any later? But not to worry. He was terrific too. The hot water heater smelled rather gassy. I couldn't detect a leak with soapy water, but could smell it. He had a really pretty intrument that found it! Way under the red knob. What? We discussed what to do. He assumed Rob was the handyman. I told him NO. I'm him. He instructed me what to do. He said "You understand?" I said "Yup." He said "really." I said "Yup." "You sure?" "Yup." I wanted to freakin' strangle him, but he was too cute. He asked if I thought I could replace the part. I said "Yup." He proceeded to tell me how and then asked if I though I could do it. "Yup." Really? "Yup." Then that pretty man said the most amazing thing, "You amaze me, I'll replace the part, free. Just call me. Here's my number. " "You joking?" "Nope." Oh...My...God!!! My new best friend!!!

Seriously, this is so funny. After dealing with the hot water heater he left and I had to deal with reality. Unfortunately he did something that took out the pilot light. I've never lite a pilot light, so when I realized we had no hot water I panicked. I called my dear friend at PG&E. No answer. I called Home Depot! Home Depot told me they couldn't tell me what to do because of liability. God, is everyone a fucking lawyer? But the guy was kind enough to tell me to "look on the front of your hot water heater...the instructions to light the pilot are there." Oh my god, an X-File moment!!!! (See, I do deserve that nerd award.) He was right. Unfortunately there is a caution. Gas leak. Yup. Had one, that's why PG&E was here. What to do?. Proceed or just throw my damn hands into the air and caution to the wind. Yeah, what's new. I winged it! I read the instructions an lite the match. Yes, of course I prayed. What? I'm not stupid.

My darling friend from PG&E called back and you will never believe what he said. It's precious. He apologized for taking out the pilot light, then asked me if I'd lite it. I said yes. He went through ever step. I passed. He then said "God, I just love you. You can install the heating element yourself." I said "NO!!!" He replied "Ahhhhhhhh, just kidding." I have to buy the part and call him when I'm ready. I asked "Can I watch?" He said "Of course. He also said something really, really special. He said "You amaze me. You're one hell of a chic." I said "You blog? You'd love Random Chic!!!" What? I'll pimp for her anytime!

Almost $700 later Maestro is okay. Well, hopefully. Maestro, you okay baby?

Yes, its real. Can you believe that?

XO

Thanks Bob...

Rob played college hockey for the University of Denver (couldn't find a decent photo, so chose the one above ~ hope it's okay hon). Great hockey school. Part of the WCHA. Those of you who know me, know Rob's a lawyer, but first and foremost, I think he's a hockey player. A great hockey player, but he realized with so many talented Canadians, he would never make it to the NHL, so decided to become a doctor or lawyer. Pursued medicine, then law. Did good!!! Bob posted about an epiphany and I didn't think of myself, I thought of Rob. And the day he came home and announce he was giving up his pursuit of a professional hockey career. Why? He was good. Very good. Why give up? And why force me to stop watching great college hockey while freezing my butt off? Rob is still a great hockey player and still handsome as ever. He's smart, funny, witty and wise. Bob's recent post reminded me to appreciate Rob's athletic talent and knowledge. Thank you Bob. I'll bring the trophies out of the garage because that's not where they belong.

The following is an amazing video out of Colorado College. Another great hockey school (Bob worked with them). It's a montage that set to music perfectly captures hockey in all it glory and when Rob viewed it, was in Heaven. That's how Rob plays hockey. And one of the reasons I love him. So when I say he's poetry on ice, that's what I mean. Thanks Bob for not only being a dear friend, but for helping me remember, and for giving us this. What beautiful memories. (God I hope this link works!!!) By the way, Rob was Captian of the team that won the CA state championship in the late 70's. And for God sakes, don't forget to turn on the sound.

~

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CjfWguY3CAw

~

Rob was a forward. The guy scoring the goals. He was good. They're quick, smart, skilled, but usually the defense men set the play up. I'd like to add, it's all done on two blades with a stick. And the equipment weighs a ton, especally when wet. I honestly believe hockey players are the best atheletes in the world. And I know atheletes. I come from a family of atheletes, so understand competition and talent. I LOVE THIS VIDEO!!! I could watch it a gazillion times. In this video you see a slap shot, a wrist shot and a snap shot. A slap shot you see coming, a wrist shot, almost, a snap snot, never! I love this video!!! It's absolutely gorgeous and reminds me of my honey.

~

Am I a complicated and complex woman? Oh, you bet I am!!! No, it's not all about roses, kitties, BMW's and Mercedes. I have depth. WHAT!!!???

XO

Maestro helping me paint the living/dining room

~

What is one thing you admire about each of your parents?
My mother's ability to pretend life is perfect.
My father's humor.
~
Which would you prefer and why? To have every stoplight turn green upon your arrival for the rest of your life or to have one week of the best sex any person ever had?
I've already had the best sex of my life (hey, I'm 48!), all I want is green lights. You all know how hectic my days are and how important a green light is. Funny, but everyone who answer this question said "best sex" on other blogs.

Hummmmmmmm.

Am I lucky or what!!!???
~
That's it! Have fun answering the questions.

And just so you know, early Sunday mornings are the best time for all green lights. My favorite day, my favorite morning.

XO

Cancer

My darling, darling friends Robyn and Frannie are battling cancer. You all know me. I'm not religious, but for some reason, this song matters. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xIAWY4LLsEw So with love, I hope they dance.

~

***UPDATE***

I think the link finally works!

And Leah, you scared the crap out of me.

I looked myself over.

Yup, I'm okay!!!

Thanks for the concern and worry.

Thanks especially for the phone number.

I'll abuse it soon!

Robyn just endured her first round of chemo Monday

and Frannie's about to have an operation.

Let's all twirl around a bit and

send good thoughts into the soft breeze for both.

~

Thanks all, you're the best. The comments are wonderful as always. And Bob, you'll laugh, but YouTube still loves me, however I have to stop trying to get in with Utuble.com and Utube.com. Just so you know, they don't work.

XO

Suze!

Take time...

I have a very, very, very dear friend. She sent an email with this beautiful photo and following words. I love you Cielo. Honestly, I do. Thank you. I think all of us in Blogger Land understand.

~~~

Last night I was reflecting on the many wonderful friends I have found here in blogland, and it occurred to me that though we might never meet in person and miles may lie between us, we're never far apart, for blogging doesn't count the miles, it's measured by the heart…. And I’m glad to call you my friend… here is something I made; a little logo in honor to friendship and comradeship.... I’ve posted it on my today’s post for whoever wants to get it, but wanted to make it more personal by emailing it to all my SPECIAL friends in blogland… And you are one of them!

May the sun shine upon you today….

Hugs

Cielo

~~

http://houseinroses.blogspot.com/ Please take this and share the love. Cielo would be so honored. Plus, it's pretty!!!

My darling friend Fannie sent this to me this morning. I laughed so damn hard I knew I had to share it. Yes. I'm still laughing.
~~

FINALLY!! Someone who agrees with my lifestyle!!!

An interview with World renowned health expert, Dr. Ima Nomskal......

Q: I've heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life; is this true?

A: Your heart is only good for so many beats,and that's it. Don't waste them on exercise. Everything wears out eventually. Speeding up your heart will not make you live longer; that's like saying you can extend the life of your car by driving it faster. Want to live longer? Take a nap. ~

Q: Should I cut down on meat and eat more fruits and vegetables?

A: You must grasp logistical efficiencies. What does a cow eat? Hay and corn. And what are these? Vegetables. So a steak is nothing more than an efficient mechanism of delivering vegetables to your system. Need grain? Eat chicken. Beef is also a good source of field grass (green leafy vegetable). And a pork chop can give you 100% of your recommended daily allowance of vegetable products.

~

Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?

A: No, not at all. Wine is made from fruit. Brandy is distilled wine, that means they take the water out of the fruity bit so you get even more of the goodness that way. Beer is also made out of grain. Bottoms up!

~

Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?

A: Well, if you have a body and you have fat your ratio is one to one. If you have two bodies, your ratio is two to one, etc.

~

Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?

A: Can't think of a single one, sorry. My philosophy is: No Pain...Good!

~

Q: Aren't fried foods bad for you?

A: YOU'RE NOT LISTENING!!! . . . Foods are fried these days in vegetable oil. In fact, they're permeated in it. How could getting more vegetables be bad for you?

~

Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?

A: Definitely not! When you exercise a muscle, it gets bigger. You should only be doing sit-ups if you want a bigger stomach

~

Q: Is chocolate bad for me?

A: Are you crazy? HELLO Cocoa beans! Another vegetable!!! It's the best feel-good food around!

~

Q: Is swimming good for your figure?

A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.

~

Well, I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets. And remember: 'Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather an attempt to skid in sideways - Cabernet in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming 'WOO HOO, What a Ride!'

-------------------------------------------------

And . . . . . For those of you who watch what you eat, here's the final word on nutrition and health. It's a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting nutritional studies.

1. The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

2 The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

3. The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

4. The Italians drink a lot of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

5. The Germans drink a lot of beers and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

CONCLUSION: Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.

~

HAPPY TUESDAY MY DEAR FRIENDS!!! XO

A Parade!

Yesterday was a funny day. I woke up, walked out of the bath room with my glasses on my head as usual. Newman tripped me. To avoid hurting him my body did all sorts of wierd jirations, my glasses flew off my head and when they landed, so did my foot. Yup, right on them. R.I.P. dear friend. In our household we call that a "Shemp." (Yes, of course The Three Stooges!)

I returned from the park and had to go to the Vet's office to pick up a bag of special kitty food for our darling Sweet Pea at about $30 for freakin' 10 lbs. (he deals with urinary issues) and traffic was brought to a hault as I was about to enter the parking lot. For what?! Yup, turkeys parading across the road. A whole lotta them! I was waiting for the band too! It was hilarious.

I parked the car then ran to the neighbors house to take photos.

Trust me, I love the house too. My favorite architecture. Reminds me of both Berkeley and Woodstock. If I could, I'd lift it off it's foundation and plant it in the middle of a 5-10 acre lot and start an animal sanctuary. And in late Spring, when the Wisteria is in bloom, dear God the beauty is insane. I'll take photos next year.

~

The turkeys just wandered up the drive pecking and having a good old time. Went into the rose garden, across the lawn (didn't get photos of that), then into the drive again and just hung out!

They discussed the color blue...

The value of a 401k and the sinking economy...

Life on the streets...

Sex and rock-n-roll...

But I had to boogie, so walked back to the Vet's office.

Yup, that's the Vet's office.

The side yard, with the black stray they adopted.

That's the Greek Orthodox church to the north (it's really lovely).

Returned to the car after buying Sweet Pea's food and couldn't help but notice all the pecking in the garden and Mr. Tom coming out to see what the hell I was up to. Yup. Came right up to me. Was within inches when I said "Hey buster, don't come any closer and for God sakes don't hurt me, cuz I'm a sissy."

Mr. Bigshot.

Mr Bigshot taking the ladies to church! Apparently seeking sanctuary.

~

This was my last shot because I ran out of memory on my camera. But what followed was hilarious. The entire staff at the vets, plus clients were out the door watching 18 turkeys walk through the parking lot and on to the gorgeous lawn at the Greek Orthodox church. We were all laughing and having the time of our life. It was a brilliant moment.

~

Life is good.

XO Suze

P.S. I didn't respond to all your comments in the previous post. I'm sorry. I appreciate each and every one. Thank you for your love and support. You guy/gals are the best.