Sunday, February 8, 2009

Kylie, who I love, asked me not to leave. I do have to leave however because so much is demanding my attention. But I decided to leave on a good, funny note rather than on the pathetic one earlier.

Gig and I talked tonight and she said something so precious. She reminded me that I'm a good person and that everyone I love so much in blogger land understands my passion. I would like to be a better person. I would like to do no harm and yet I do. Life is complicated. But I love Gig for loving me despite my mistakes. I know there's hope for me. I do.
It's true. I love sheep. I think I'm British! (Well I am, but that's a whole nother story!) I always wanted a field of sheep. Not for food, just beauty! I wanted to look out the window and watch them. I also have a thing about closets. I want to open them and see beauty, so of course all my closets are beautiful. This one in particular is filled with sheep because they're hand made by a dear friend in Florida with real fleece. The kitties go nutty and try to eat them. So they're now in the linen closet. Unfortuantely I also have a thing about fabric and collect it. So the linen closet has become one of the fabric closets! By the way, the sagging shelf is an optical illusion. It doesn't look like that at all!
My darling Mickey helping me work.
My beautiful tree that is no more.
The "Red Hat Society." I'm almost there. Just a few more months. I'm trying to make her look older. I'm almost there!
The bathroom linen closet. Yes, it's true, I love angels.
My beautiful park. I enter at the second big tree to the left!Mr. T!
Absolute beauty. Mickey.
Funny. Exhaution after grooming!
Our beautiful Maestro and our beautiful tree that no longer exits.
Our beautiful tree.
Sweet Pea. Pure elegance.

Maestro searching for comfort. He looks like he's in a marching band!
My darling, sleepy Ohno.
I miss Newman every day. I wish with all my heart he would just walk back in to our lives. There's a full moon. I was amazed. It's been a month since he left. A whole month and yet it feels like yesterday.
I'll be back. I have alot to get done. When I'm through, I'll be back. I love you all very much. Thanks for putting up with me. It matters.
XO ;)


Megan said...

Thanks for sharing those photos. Priceless, all of them. Newman is gone, and the tree is gone, but they are still in your heart. For always.


Gig said...

I am still awake...Megan beat me to being #1,LOL. I did not pay attention earlier, that you had 2 with your pic and one that said closed, boy do I feel stupid.

I really enjoyed our talk, I always do. I love your laughter Suze, so never quit laughing and finding the humor in everything that you can. Remember what I said about how we all understand and accept one other for who we are, as we are...none of us are perfect. Well, maybe some days I am,LOL, just kidding!

Now to this post, It is beautiful, it is perfect.
We will talk soon my dear friend, now I expect that email sooooon, ok?
love you,

Hi Megan!!

just bob said...

Since I've been accused of only writing short replies here, I'm going to take an opportunity to expound.

Gig is very correct when she says that everyone in blogger land understands your passion. You invest a great deal of emotion in everything you do, whether it be your art, your pets, feeding the ferals, or your friends. While it brings you great joy, it also can bring heartbreak. There seemingly has been plenty of that lately.

I know that sometimes I feel like life gets overwhelming too. Sometimes it is the big stuff bearing down on me, or the little stuff accumulating in such large amounts that it becomes a mountain that looks like it will never be conquered. In either case, I forget to breathe and both panic and anxiety return to the surface of my mind. I tend to think in some way this might be happening to you right now.

So I think this break you are taking will be of great benefit to you. It's your chance to stop, breathe, prioritize, and refresh. In a busy world, we sometimes forget to take the time to organize, grieve, or relax. This is your chance to do just that. While I will miss you during this time, I know it will be for your best and that your passion for your friends will eventually bring you back to us.

How's that for a short comment?

Gig said...

I think that was Great for a "short" comment! I agree with you 200%.

Suze, we've already talked and will continue to, but read and listen to what JBob said, we are all here now and will be in the future. Now go take care of your precious animals, beautiful garden and do the laundry, oh don't forget to load the dishwasher. Yes, I am laughing...remember you have to get your picture taken at the DMV real soon!!

Love you,
gig, xoxo

Beachbum said...

I know that i haven't been on here for about a year, but i really hope you remember me. I'm, as you would say, "Baby Suzanne" and i really regret disappearing for so long. I don't know why you're leaving but honestly i hope you'll come back some day. And the reason I came back was to check on Helen and her family because I know they live in Victoria and I wanted to make sure that they got evacuated safely from the fire. I really hope to hear back from you just to say hi. You can stop by my new blog anytime you like but you obviously don't have to.
Goodbye Suzanne, love,

Anonymous said...

Just Bob has said it all..

Mr. Shife said...

We love you too, and thanks for sharing all of the wonderful pictures. If Mrs. Shife ever own enough land we want lots of bassets, miniature horses and miniature goats. What can I say I like dwarf animals.

Leah said...

Wow, nice closets! Seriously.

Karen ^..^ said...

I love your closets too.

And I love your sheep, kitties, pink florally things, roses, artwork, and most of all, YOU.

I agree with Bobness. He is quite eloquent when he wants to be. But he is 100% right.

Rather than get all upended over trying to give 100% to EVERYTHING, which is impossible, its better to give to the most important, and go down from there. Obviously the ferals are at the top of the list.

We love you sweetheart, and we want you to take it easy. So you don't burn out and disappear for good.

No one wants that. I've been feeling a bit overwhelmed these days too. For much different reasons, I'm sure.

But every single one of us here can relate to your situation, as we are all there too. Take care, sweet sis, and have a good vacation.

LOL, Verification word is phable. Too funny. And weird. I like weird.

just bob said...

I agree with Bobness. He is quite eloquent when he wants to be.

He's either a depressive mess or smart ass the rest of the time.

david mcmahon said...

Yes, there is a lot of substance to your theory that you might be British. The shot of those gorgeous roses proves it!

Suzanne said...

It's taken me a bit of time to come here and comment. Perhaps because you all touched a cord. I am absolutely imperfect. I'll admit it. I don't have a problem with that. I love to learn and am not ashamed when I fail or don't live up to my standards because life isn't easy. Honestly, I don't think it's supposed to be. I just wish I could do better. That I was a better person. Smarter. Made better choices. But I'm not, I'm just me and I fail miserably. And that just breaks my heart because I'm almost 50 and how much time do I have left to get this right?

I love you all very, very much. Thank you for your words, your kindness and wisdom. It matters. Trust me. It matters. I'll find my way and as Bob said, taking a break is a good thing. And it is. I'm connecting with old friends and they matter. Just exhaling matters. Thank you one and all. And yes, I'm listening. I heard every word.


Anonymous said...