Thursday, July 31, 2008

Menopause

The container last year. Doesn't look like that this year because I just got the Impatients planted! Oh, and that's the old BMW. Doesn't look like that this year...cuz it's now a black Mercedes. Change is good.

It's almost 1 am and here I sit. I just returned from the corner store. The Indian guy behind the counter laughs every time I arrive now. I'm going through menopause and he knows. I stop by when I can't sleep to pick up a snack. He laughed especially loud tonight. Hey!!! Not funny. I'm stugglin' here! Told me "See you in a few days." Wise ass. But he's right.

I talked to Mom the other day. Asked "Mom, how long did it take you to get through menopause?" She replied "8 years." She's a freakin' comedian.

43 comments:

Walker said...

OMG it's 5 am and I just walked in from the 7/11 and the Indian guy there smiled at me.
Yeah think maybe...... nah he's probably gay or wanted the last chocolate donut I took.

That plant looked real good last year and I'm sure you can make it look just the same again this year.
So umm what kind of ferilizer did you use to make the BMW grow into a Mercedes and do you think it could change a moutain bike into a Harley?

I hope you feeling better soon at keast faster than eight years.

Suzanne said...

Dude! It's almost 3 am! God, will this never end? I love my Indian friend. He's a keeper. Way, way, way too funny. I love that guy and I didn't even buy a donut!

If you go back you will see what happened to our beautiful BMW. Horrible accident. But we got a Mercedes! Hey! Not too bad! And the plant did well.

just bob said...

I wanted a Slurpee. Why didn't you pick me up a Slurpee?

Hi Blottie!

Shara said...

Hi Suzanne,
Menopause...rather like Limbo...waiting for things to get settled! To understand your body again...for me it moved rather swiftly (about 2 years) I just didn't sleep for those years..LOL!
I'm back home and will start unpackin' the memories & pictures.
Yours is the first to visit...don't leave us!
Shara

Suzanne said...

Bob,

Sorry my dear. The comedian behind the counter distracted me. I'll stay focused next time.

XO Blottie

Suzanne said...

Shara!!!

Welcome home my dear Queen. (Where did The Queen go young lady?)

I'm not leaving because this is the best therapy. If all of you can put up with my banter I can write it. I'm just in a bit of a funk lately. Not because of my birthday (that's turning out GREAT!), but just exhaustion and disappointment at the park, etc.

You know, I asked Mom months ago how long it took to get through menopause and she said 8 years. I thought she was kidding. She wasn't!!! It actually took her 8 years. I'm freakin' out! I can't imagine going to the corner store for 8 years, nor can I imagine not sleeping. I have to get out of this some how. What do you suggest?!

XO

Leah said...

What do you get for your middle of the night snack? That sounds sort of fun, actually. I mean, besides the menopause part. Is it corner enough to just walk to?

Queen Goob said...

So, will you hate when I tell you my mom informed me it wasn't a hot flash. But then again what does she know - neither she nor her mother ever went through menopause. Looks like my sister and I have a menopause-free aging process to look forward to.

YESSSSSS!!!!!!!!

Hey, I haven't updated my blog roll in, oh, a couple of months? But I keep coming back nonetheless. I promise to update while on vacation, 'kay?

But you'll need to remind me because as the Julie Brown song goes...."cause I'm a blonde, yea, yea, yea!"

WV - inosipm

Is that Swahili for I no sleep at night? LMAO

Suzanne said...

Leah, I get booze! Oh and no, I don't walk. I'm a sissy. I get in the Mercedes and spend about $2 on gas to travel 1.1 miles.

Suzanne said...

And yes, it is "corner" enough to just walk to. I'm one lazy bitch.

Suzanne said...

Goobie...

You're kidding, right? How can a woman not go through menopause. What? Poof you're old?! Not funny. I don't believe that. Prove it.

Blog rolls. Cry me a river baby and then reinvent mine. I have to do it all by myself don't I? Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh God. I need an assistant. GIG!!!!

Queen Goob said...

You need an assistant? How good's the pay, I'm a bit anal retentive and love to organize.

And really, no menopause. At least not the “normal”; no hot flashes, no aches, pains, lack of sleep, they just slid right into old age.

Gig said...

Hey Blottie,
You rang? I think Goobie might be the answer to our, your prayers for an assistant...

I could use a slurpee as long as it has booze in it, oh yea, just need to go to the onion for a Wops!! Rough week,so booze will help,lol.

I went through the "surgical" menapause in my 30's, so have not had to endure the hot flashes, etc. Always been a night owl though...

Computer is still in for repairs, thought I was going to have my mom's, but she wouldn't loan it out,*am pouting and whining*, as I will only be able to check in every few days.

Got to get some sleep, long day at work tomorrow.
Love ya, Blottie!!

Suzanne said...

Is that chick for real? Yup! She's all ours!!!

Joyful Jo said...

Hey Suzanne.
I'm supposed to be going through menopause now but so far don't seem to have your lack of sleep.
My main symptom is the what am i in this romm for or what was i going to do.
instead mark said he is the one going through menopause not me.

Suzanne said...

So Queen Goob, you want to take the job of assistant?! Oh, I know Gig's laughing. Do you know what she had the nerve to say to me once? That she couldn't find an assistant for me because I'm too demanding. Thank you honey for proving her WRONG!!! "Gig...look who's laughin' now baby."

Unfortunately, this might be the deal breaker. Sorta like the Wild Onion, this isn't a payin' "gig." Still want it?! We'll have a hoot. ;)

XO

Suzanne said...

Gig! My favorite princess. Yup, Goobie just might work if she excepts the pay scale. I like her!

Bob's the best bartender. He'll take great care of you. Did you see Jorge over there on the dance floor? Go tell him you had a hard week and maybe he'll let you cut in (he's dancing with himself and he's very good I might add).

So with surgery, poof, you're free? None of this nonsense? I'm not a night owl. I'm a morning person. This seems like a very bad joke. "Bob, I need a WOPS to ease my pain." Oh right, I'm on my own blog. Guess I'll have to walk my butt over to the Wild Onion to get a WOPS, Whoops!

Who's computer are you using? Please tell yours to GET WELL SOON.

Have a wonderful week. Oh right, it's Friday again. I'm so tired I didn't even know it was August this morning. Have a terrific weekend!

XO Blottie

Suzanne said...

Jo! So good to hear from you. I'm laughing because, like you I have that problem too. I hate to admit it here!!! For instance, I'll be in the bathroom looking at towels in the linen closet trying to remember "Why am I here? Oh right, I needed peas from the freezer." I have no idea what's going on. My mother made me laugh so hard the other day when she said "Perhaps it's the onset of dementia." I replied "Mom, I'm not even 50, knock it off." She said "Well, it might be a lot less painful."

And Mark. I'd like to see a man go though one painful period and a few hot flashes. Of course I'm laughing Jo!!! Pull up a chair baby, this is gonna be good.

Have a great weekend you guys. Love to Helen and the kitties.


XO!

bindhiya said...

Sweetie,
Hope you having a good evening..
am sorry I missed your call.. brians dad was in hospital and still he is.. he had a open heart surgery 3yrs ago..

love and ((hugs))
bindi

Gig said...

Princess? And a favorite one to boot!! I love it, never been called a princess, so don't stop!!

I think Goobie would be perfect for the job, great sense of humor, likes to spend time at the Onion and is willing (I think) to be your assistant!!

Oh, and Goobie, I don't quite recall ever saying that Suze is demanding...but then I might have early onset of dementia, whatever that is,lol.

Suze, I am a using a friends laptop, mine is hopefully being repaired...

Gotta go pick up my take out order of Super Duper WOPS from our Bob, what a great guy, the hrs he works, I think he should get a raise!!

Love ya, Blottie
Princess Gig

KJ said...

Suzanne...

May I recommend listening, and dancing to, the Mama Mia! soundtrack during these late nights?

my mum says it does the trick :) Apparently Abba and the like is good for any woman, anytime.

Hang in there!
~KJ

kylie said...

i dont think i'm going through menopause so can you give me an excuse for not knowing what i'm doing?
my mum calls it a seniors moment but i dont qualify for that
my sister calls it pregnant brain but i dont qualify for that either

where's maithri, maybe he could diagnose me

have a great weekend suze

Skeeter said...

Menopause, yikes! I'm so glad that doesn't happen to men. It's much less stressful having the metabolism slow down, the belly start peeking over the belt, and those moments of forgetfulness ...

Best wishes throughout the next 8 years (or however long it takes dear).
Skeeter

Robyn said...

LMAO! See I totally knew this about you Suze! I so called this! I know you like I know my own hands my darling friend! Ok...listen up very carefully! I want you to go to Natural Food Co-op and go talk to the Vitamin GURU there. And ask about the NATURAL supplements to help with this hiccup! I helped my mom when she started (a while ago) and it totally worked for her. SO! GO RIGHT NOW!

And just to clue you in...since I have NO THYROID...and when they(doctors) made me HYPO (slow) thyroidism I went NUTS! Poor Jim thought he was married to a wacko! I was over the top...but soon that settled..but I am always on the edge...don't push me folks..LMAO! This too shall pass missy! Hang tight and punch a couple pillows and take a fan in to your room and or park yourself on the couch and have it pointed right on you! And I WILL run down to the corner store for ya! And get you and Bob something! What the hell I will just get all the makings for a early morning party! LOL!
Love ya doll!
Robyn

MARIA said...

Hi dear Suzanne,
I love your beautiful pic, in large is great.
Thanks, I'm free from menopause in my age. But I remember it was horrible. I looked as I used too much red color on my cheeks.

Have a beautiful Sunday!

Debbie in CA : ) said...

Oh my dear, I never know what I will find when I stop by here to say "Hi." You're so open and honest and refreshing. What a joy to laugh! THANK YOU! : )

Shara said...

Hey Suzanne,
Just take one day at a time and soon you're on the other side.
Keep your voice...scream out if you must but let it all out!
I'm back from month in Singapore and now in Texarkana, Texas which is a border city, half on Texas and half on Arkansas. I will drive on out to see our little Bindi on Tuesday. Got a little gift I hope will remind her of home and help her feel better.
Her pictures of Serene are just adorable. It's about a 3 hour drive but a really beautiful trip.
Hang Tough,
Queenie

Suzanne said...

Okay, okay, okay, I know I have to write a new post (and retype my blog roll, and visit friends, and collect my awards...I KNOW!!!), but before I do it'll feel like old times here. I'm going to respond to every comment before I move on because I thought today was Monday, but it was Sunday, so I've been given the gift of an extra day. That's how it works, right? And, believe it or not every comment is going to be 20 words or less. Bring out the counter. (Oh, and salutations don't count.)

***
~ Bindi, no need to worry honey, the news will wait. Hope your FIL heals quickly. (16)

Love you baby and as always, you and Serene look gorgeous in white! (13)
XO
(Okay, so technically the first 16 are considered "Text," the last 13 are considered "a salutation," and the last 11 are instructional. (22)

*This is gonna work!*

***

Hey Princess,

Goobie went off and left for vacation without informing the boss. The first mistake of a new assistant. JEEEEEEEEEEEZZZZZZZZZZZZ!

LOVE YOU!
Suze XO

***

KJ!!!

Think about you so much. Can't listen because Sweet Pea chewed speaker wire in half. Seriously! Will figure it out.

LOVE YOU!
ME

P.S. How do people write short comments. That was 20 words. It actually hurt. I'll visit honey. ( A p.s. is instructional too. My new rule.)

***

Kylie,

From now on let's just call it "A Kylie." That's what I intend to do! Perhaps no one will notice I'm going through menopause. Especially me. (Went over by 6 words. My bad.)

XO LOVE YA SMARTY PANTS!

***

Skeeter,

Oh, forgot to mention, we get that too. Men. They have it so easy, but complain they never get enough.

20! Bingo! XO Baby!

***
Robyn,

OH NO! (Whoops, here come the kitty! Okay, this doesn't count.)

***

Robyn,

I need specific instructions that include name of product and isle #. Of course I'm serious!

I'm going to tell you something I learned in the past 2 minutes. I couldn't write like this if my life depended on it!!! How do people use so few words? Okay, 20 words or less is history.

Robyn, seriously, give me names. My neighbor gave me a soy based product. I've yet to use it. Using it will probably help when I open it. Wish me luck with that one honey!

Love you so much and thanks for the info #6. (Yes, I saw that!!!)


XO
Maxwell Smart

P.S. Fortunately Rob doesn't think he's married to a wacko...just more of the same!

***

Maria!

Your English is improving by leaps and bounds. Mine is too, but my Polish sucks! You're comment made me laugh very hard because my cheeks are so red all the time. I've been wondering what's wrong. Apparently nothing. Just menopause!!! Thank God!

Love dear friend,
Suze XO

Suzanne said...

Publishing was pure accident, sorry about that cuz I have two sweeties to go:

Darlin' Debbie,

Wish me luck baby! I never know what to expect either, but encouragement from friends like you makes all the difference. I have to get that awards post out soon, so get ready.

Hope all is dandy and I'll visit soon. Thanks for always stopping by.

Much love,
Suze

***

Shara The Queen,

I'm so happy you're back and even happier you're visiting Bindi with a gift! You are such a dear friend and sweetie to all of us. Have a safe trip and beautiful drive. Thanks with all my heart for the tips and yes, I will scream out loud because this is some nasty crap. Cover your ears baby!!!

Love you so much and glad to have you home. I'll visit soon.

XO
Me!

***

Okay, I'm done and this is what I learned. I'm not a 20 words or less kinda woman. Can't do it, not goin' there. I'm back baby! ;)

ShutterSpy said...

Just popped in to say hello :)

Random Chick said...

Dear Suzanne,

I still get PMS so just pick me up on your way to the corner store. The Indian guy will get a hoot out of you and your hot flashes and me and my cranky bitchiness...you get the booze, I'll get the chocolate and the chips!!!

XOXOXO
RC

Robyn said...

Suze! I will be sending you the info you are requesting and I told you about! How are you feeling! I haven't seen you over at my place! What gives?! Huh? girly! Come by miss ya!
Hugs,
Robyn

krystyna said...

Don't worry about menopause Suzanne. I saw something special for you at my mom's blog. Maybe you'll forget about menop.for moment or for long.

Love & hugssss!

MARIA said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU DEAR SUZANNE!!!

Diva said...

Ack. I'm right behind you. My mom said around 7 years....

Lots and lots to look forward to.

Suzanne said...

Shutterspy! Hi honey. I'll pop over soon. So nice to have you back. We've all missed you.

XO

Suzanne said...

RC,

Who's payin' for gas?

XO

Suzanne said...

Robyn,

I've already been there!

XO

Suzanne said...

Thanks Krystyna! I love it!

XO

Suzanne said...

Maria ~ I love you my dear. Thank you!

XO

Suzanne said...

Diva,

It doesn't seem possible after decades of misery, does it?! Good luck with those 7 years. I'll visit you at the funny farm and please don't forget to visit me.

XO

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