Tuesday, February 5, 2008

My First Award!

My beautiful friend Cielo at House In The Roses was kind enough to honor me with this award. Thank you sweetie. In a few days I'll place it in the right hand margin so I can view it often. This is my first award, so I do want to show it off...all the time!

Please visit Cielo if you haven't done so already. She writes and photographs so beautifully. She wrote a post a few weeks ago intitled Insomnia ~ take a peek, you won't be disappointed. She's lovely, charming, romantic, kind and gifted. You'll see.

I also have to mention I've been Tagged a lot over the past few weeks and still haven't found the time to write all the juicy personal stuff about myself, but I will. Be on the alert! This is a leap year, so I'll get 24 extra hours this month to play catch-up. Thanks to all of you who felt I was worthy.

Cielo, thank you. I'll do you proud honey!

Love you,
Suzanne

45 comments:

Judy Mackey said...

You have a wonderful blog!

Enjoyed your photos, art and writings.

Judy

bindhiya said...

Dear Suzanne,
Congrats on your award!
You make my day too..
love you..
have a beautiful day
bindi

savannah_rae said...

Hello honey. I have not been to your blog in so long, actually...I just haven't been on blogger...and I was updating mine today and just wanted to tell you I missed you. And I've been thinking about you and your kitties. I hope all is going well. I can't even remember if I replied to the last comments you left, and I'm sorry for that. Things have been crazy as usual in my life, but it's still going fairly well. I look forward to catching up on everything, and I hope you are having a great evening.

XOXO, Savannah

Suzanne said...

Hi Judy!

Welcome. I visited your blog and love your work. When I have more time I'll give you specific canvases! Love the dog. I actually just love how you paint. What are the canvas sizes. I paint really big, it appears you don't. Nice job and thanks for gracing my blog. I always love when people drop by.

XO Suzanne

Suzanne said...

Bindi...

I love you. I'm sending it to you next you know. Just have to figure out how!!! I guess I just type. Right?

XO Suzanne :)

P.S. I still don't even have your blessing up. I'm trying honey. I feel like my boat in half sinking most of the time! No really.

kylie said...

hey, im at work and should be working but i have to tell you...i had nothing intelligent to say on your elections but now i have it....go obama!!! he's sooo easy on the eye ;)

Cecile said...

Congrats! Now I want an award too! I'm jealous. LOL

Inside our hands, outside our hearts said...

Congrats on your your first award.

smiles,
T

Suzanne said...

Kylie,

Obama, Obama, Obama. My dear friend in North Carolina and I discussed him forever the other day. She doesn't want Hillary, she wants Obama, not because he's "pretty," but wise. He is pretty too! I'm afraid for him however. Also for Hillary. There are so many crazy people in this world and suddenly I feel very protective of them both. Diana and Rob have both said "...they know what they're doing." I have to assume that is true.

I was on your blog this morning and I swear, I could not stop laughing. What a fun place to be early in the morning!!! I'm going to try and visit every day now!!!

Love you dear,
Suzanne

Suzanne said...

Cecile~

So happy you're okay. Don't worry, no need to be envious...I'm going to give the sucker out to practically everyone I know!!!! You're on the list baby! :) It's coming as soon as I get my a** organized.

Love you!
Suze

Suzanne said...

Tara,

It's so nice to have you and that beautiful body here!

Thank you...it's coming your way soon. It's coming everyone's way soon!

XO Suzanne :)

Robyn said...

Suzanne,

Well you certainly are like a breath of fresh air. I have been sort of out of it today. Not really not knowing why, just lots more thinking. I did however purchase a very thick lined notebook and went to a park today with a cup of hot joe and Glacier. We sat under a tree wrapped up and with Glacier laying almost on top of me.

Both of us enjoying the sun and warmth on our faces. I looked at the pages for a very long time, before I put pen to paper. And began with..."I knocked on the door...". And it started pouring out of me. I was a mad woman trying to catch up with all my thoughts swirling around in my head and trying to capture all them on paper.

Who knew that this would happen. No clue? I have always loved writing. Have done journals since I was a kid, but stopped after the war.

I have a foot locker filled with uniforms and medals and tons of leather bound journals beginning from when I was in bootcamp. Those have been locked up for years. It pains me to even walk by that foot locker every morning. But I have it in my room as a daily reminder to my fallen friends.

This journal is a weighty one at that. And much broader pages and lined also. I love the crispness of the pages and how the black ink looks on the pages. Before I got up and walked back to my car, I had written almost 30 pages! Can you believe it 30 PAGES! What...that is insane. I know what Brian was looking for 'flow', boy did I have it. And someone wrote on his blog about just letting it happen (the welder). Yes, I now agree more than ever to just let it happen and not try to force the mood or space.

Did I feel good after writing 30 pages? No...I feel nothing really. Just a bit annoyed that I have to go back to work tomorrow. And that the sun was setting. Oh well...there is always another day.

It's 1030pm and I need to put up a new posting. Toodles for now. I am sure I will be back! This is my safe haven as CSI's space is too!
Love you to pieces!
Robyn

Gig said...

Suzanne,
1st, Congrats on a well deserved award!
2nd, Amen, to your response on 1Pic. You picked us all up when we were shut out and we have all become part of an ever expanding blogging family! Enuf said on that subject.
3d, am still working on getting you an assistant ;)

hugs,
Debbie

kylie said...

you big whinger....take another look at my post

Hezzy Magee said...

Hi Suzanne,
Congratulations on your award.

I decided to create a blog! =D

- Helen

Skeeter said...

Congrats on your award! You really do have a great blog, you've worked hard on it. Best wishes :-)

Suzanne said...

Please excuse me everyone, but Helen is here!!! She's here. Can you believe it???!!! Helen, we just adore you. Thank God you have your own blog. You're gonna' be a big hit honey! But you really should thank your dad for your popularity, because without him, we wouldn't know you! Honey, if you have time between school, french horn and all the other stuff, can you please visit Brian at CSI Seattle and get the mini-me photo up!? You will shock the crap out of that poor man! I wish I could see his face the moment he reads your comment! That will be too brilliant! I am so happy you're here. Don't go away sweetie! Oh, and keep the Santa hat on. It becomes you!

Honey, welcome to blogger land. I am so happy you're here.

Love, Suzanne

Suzanne said...

Robyn,

Do you know what I love most? That this is a safe haven. That Brian and I offer something you can't find anywhere else. What a precious gift to us. The moment I met Brian I new he was a gem. You knew it too. And together we have something very precious.

When I began this journey I had a few wishes. That it would be a place to discuss art, life, poetry, writing, a place to laugh and be silly. It has become that and more. I couldn't hope for more. You have all made it exactly what I wanted. When ever I'm tired or down, I think of this place and realize dreams do come true. I wouldn't change anything.

I love all of you so much for gracing my life and this blog.

XO Suzanne

Suzanne said...

Gig,

Can you believe it. An award! Who knew I was worthy?

I loved what you said about 1Pic. I picked you up. What a generous statement. Do I believe it? No. It was an odd set of circumstances. I still think it was sad and that he was the one who lost. I gained. I often wonder what compells someone to do what he did because I couldn't imagine hurting that many people.

Suzanne said...

Kylie,

I read, was blinded, but found my way. What was so funny is you printed it in ordinary text too, but I never noticed! That's just too funny.

krystyna said...

Hi Suzanne!
Congratulations for your first award! You deserved it!
I'd like to award you too, so please, go to my Evolve blog:

http://evolvesmb.blogspot.com/

and take that award: "A friend for good and bad time".

You are great friend!

krystyna said...

House In The Roses is really very beautiful!
Thanks for Cielo's link!

Have a wonderful, happy day!

Peter said...

An award - wow! An honour indeed for you, my dear. I love visiting your blog and seeing all the wonderful things that you create. I know that my stance on the old lady thing has maybe caused some issues (but we won't mention that again!). I am lucky that you take the time to visit my blog and comment - thankyou from the bottom of my (sometimes useless) heart! I really hope I can get the internet at my flat, and then I can write longer, and read everyone's blogs in more depth. Fingers crossed!
Take care sweetie, xx

bindhiya said...

Good Morning Dear Suzanne,

You said the right word to Pat, i hate it when people trying invade your place.
Please delete that comment, please.
this is a your place, everyday am happy here spending my mornings.
Have a beautiful day.
love you
bindi

Ele at abitofpinkheaven said...

Thank you so much for commenting on my blog...now I can find you! Everything is WONDERFUL. Your pictures, writings, paintings, thought process...all so lovely. Congrats on your award! I shall return!

Suzanne said...

Bindi, I love you. Have a beautiful day. Did you see that Helen wrote!!! She has her own blog! And did you see that Savannah is here!

I came this morning to erase, erase, erase. I'm going to the park to think about it some more. I probably will. This has become such a wonderful place to be and all that stuff makes it feel ugly.

Love you. XO

NAME: CIELO said...

My Dear friend, you so well deserve this award, and many more, for all the wonderful things that you create....

John Lennon has a saying (or a quote): "I get by with a little help from my friends." And that's how I think of you.

Love ya!

Cielo

Suzanne said...

Bindi,

I'm so late leaving for the park. I came back and erased, erased, erased. I decided I didn't want to come back to it. You know me. Always too fair, but as I was walking out the door, your words were so powerful. I turned around and came back. The delete button is here for a reason. Thank you for helping me do what I seemed unable to do on my own. I love you so much. Most of us are together because of him, but he doesn't have a place here any more. By gones.

XO

Suzanne said...

Hi Cielo,

I'm late to the park, but I guess for a reason. I just wrote to Bindi, erased some crap, have tear in my eyes, and then you appeared. Thank you. I'm going to get in my car, drive to the park and smile because I have such wonderful friends. And yes, they help me get by too.

And honey, thanks for the award. It really made my day, my week, my month, etc.!

Love you ~

savannah_rae said...

Hello Suzanne!!

I read many of the comments that aren't here this morning in my email, and I just wanted to say a few things....you don't have to post this if you don't want.

First, I wanted to thank you so much for the beautiful and kind words you have said to me, and about me. You really can't begin to understand that it means the world to me.

When I first read your comment to me, I was so excited and happy, and then I felt a little sting with the last line about not being so self absorbed and forgetting those who love me. At first, I won't lie...I was a little pissed. haha But then I realized, you hit the nail on the head. And the reason I felt so defensive, was because you called me out on something I haven't been able to call myself out on. I notice this is something I'm doing with my family...maybe not out of intention...but out of pain and hurt. Kind of like, "well you've hurt me, and I feel like you aren't there for me now, and don't care for me...so why should I involve myself with you?" But I recognize this now, and I thank you for the awareness...I am making a promise to myself to fix it.

...That was not my intent with my dissapperance from blogger. I thought in one of my earlier posts I mentioned limitting my time online. I felt like that was one thing I was doing that was unhealthy in my life, and if I could improve that...spend the time I spend online doing something outside or productive, etc, that I would feel better/be a better person. I don't regret my time away. I do feel better. I've been able to adjust attitudes and my outlook for this year.

I'm sure you remember my story to Ludmila, about my "internet friend"...and when everything started going crazy with O and people were so easy to be defensive and take sides...I felt that was another unhealthy part of the internet that I wanted to step back from. It really took a lot for me to start a blog, and to get wrapped up into blogger (with the blog of note, etc) and to just realize how easily we trust people we don't really know. We trust what they can write to us daily, but we don't really know them. I just started to freak out. I never felt so vulnerable as I did the night I realized those "boys" were lying to me. That I could have easily been abducted, murdered, who knows what! It's just so scary to me. And I never want to experience that. I didn't want to open myself up to getting hurt by people I thought I knew again. I don't know if that can make sense, but it does to me. I wasn't meaning to alienate anyone, and if I made anyone feel that way, I do deeply apologize.

I don't really know where I'm going with this, but I just wanted to again apologize to you and to everyone else that I may have offended or hurt. My life has just seemed so out of control to me lately, and I don't know if I'm just picking at it and making it worse or actually helping...

Anyway...I love you all, and I'll be around. =]

XOXO, Savannah

Cecile said...

Yeah for Helen! Oh and I still have to be envious because you got yours first. (LOL and JK)

On a serious note (yes I have a serious side.)I need to find a way to talk to you privately because a dear friend of ours needs your help.

Cecile said...

Suz, view my complete profile and contact me, seriously, it is important.

Suzanne said...

Cecile ~ I did. I'm waiting. Hurry because I'm worried.

Suzanne said...

Cecile ~ I'm almost 50. You're going to give me a heart attack! Seriously. You can't say something like that then not respond to my email in like, a second! If I have to wait until you get home tonight, I swear I will...

Yes, fill in the blank. But before you do, email.

XO

Lynn@ The Vintage Nest said...

Hi Suzanne, I was so happy to have you visit my blog and hope you'll come often. I am so jealous of anyone who can paint roses. Yours are beautiful. I couldn't figure out what you were talking about with the stickers until I clicked on the photo to enlarge it. LOL..Big congratulations on your award. ~ Lynn

Suzanne said...

Okay...I'm going to go against my rule to take everyone in the order in which they were recieved. Apparently I've broken that rule alot on this comment page because Helen appeared and screwed up my plan!!! Thanks Helen! You're a gem.

And yes. I did erase a whole lotta stuff. You read it, trust me because I wrote it. It's nice to have it merely a memory now. I don't erase often, but some times I just have to because I'm sensitive and certain things just hurt my soul or something. I don't really know how to explain it. I listened to Bindi. She's always right. I've erased three times on this blog and two times I was directed to do so by Bindi and once by my dear friend Kylie in Australia. They were right every time. It's good to get something out, but even better to let it go. You all know how I feel and now we can move forward.

I want to also tell you that I'm not always nice or kind. I did a horrible thing last week when I commented on a blog I really enjoyed. I was rather rude to a guy who does a lot with bioengineering. Everything was bio this and bio that. I thought, how short sighted, so I left a comment about him. It was unfair and unkind and when I went back there were a lot of comments. Basically I got my assed kicked. I deserved it. I made my apologies, erased everything and haven't returned because I'm not welcome. My point is, when you make a mistake, don't pretend you didn't make it. Own up to it and learn. I try so hard to learn from my mistakes and I never pretend I didn't make them.

I love you all and thanks for being here. Now I have to take Savannah out of order. I know you all understand!

XO

Suzanne said...

My dear Savannah,

Sweetie, I love you. I apologize for causing you distress. You sound like my sisters. They get so annoyed with me because I say something without realizing the weight of my words, or simply the weight of a word. I have to be more careful. Often I write without thinking and that isn't a Martha Stewart "Good Thing!" Please forgive me for causing you distress. You know that wasn't my intent.

Honey, I'm so grateful to have you back, so let's be perfectly clear from here on out. Okay. New rule. We will say what we think. Quickly. No scewing around with trying to figure out something that probably doesn't matter. Write it and be done with it, then wait for a response!

I had to erase. I knew you'd read it, so knew you'd understand. He hurt us, and he doesn't belong here any more, nor do any of his friends. We've been through too much to go back. This has become such a wonderful place with so many amazing people, I don't want to pollute it. I know you understand. Many of these people are here because we all met thought him, but that's it. He facilitated our friendships, but he left us, and so we've moved on and stayed together. I'm so grateful for every single person here. Every day. I will never forget him, but I want to forget how horribly he dismissed all of us. It's a lesson sweetie. And I think that was what I was trying to convey when I wrote the sentence that hurt you so. When you matter to people, you try desperately not to hurt them. You went away and didn't tell us you were going. We all love you, so what did you think that would do to us? Every action has an equal and opposite reaction. It's absolutely okay to go away. You have that choice. It is absolutely NOT okay to do it without warning the people who love you.

I remember 1Pic's January 3rd Dooms Day photo and knew something was about to happen. It did. That was the only warning he gave, but I know so many of his fans didn't realize what he was doing. You don't do that to people sweetie. You just don't. He's never apologized to a single person that I know of. Never. I know he's here, but he doesn't belong here and I don't want him here. I don't want his friends here who still judge and behave selfishly. I don't care what they think. You DON'T do that to people who care about you. So to all of you reading this who are still waiting for something to happen...go away and leave us alone. You can still see him and communicate with him on Flickr. Just type in 1Pic. Voila. Done. You didn't think he'd actually go away forever! Did you?

That was cathartic. They're all gone. They can get their fix.

Honey, I know you had a horrible internet experience. Hopefully you've learned a valuable lesson. Be more careful, but I have different sorts of friends. The ones that actually matter. None of my friends here are fake. Just get on their blogs and the answer is revealed in a matter of seconds. We're mostly women and a few guys who actually generate a thought! And at times, not too brilliantly! We all deserve one another and belong together. I think getting older helps one disect life and certainly get out the rift-raft! This is a wonderful place to be. I'm so grateful I'm here.

I love you Savannh and I know you know that. I think you have a lot of reconnecting to do.

XO

Suzanne said...

One more thing sweetie. No one uttered a single word. What you did was so close on the heals of the pain 1pic caused, that no one spoke. I'm not sure whether it was out of respect or fear, but no one spoke. But I think in everyone's heart they were in agony and simply didn't know what to do. I don't think you understand how much we all love you and when you left, how much that hurt. We aren't our parents sweetie...we're just us. We didn't deserve that.

bindhiya said...

Dear Suzanne,
No one uttered a single word cause it is only Suzanne's place. this is your place take control.
here we want to be talking to Suzanne not to pat, 1 pic, savannah or anyone else.
so please anything other than that "trash"
love you
bindi

savannah_rae said...

Just wanted to say real quick...I didn't want you to think that I took your comment out of context. I knew you didn't mean it to be hurtful. I know you care for me and my well being. I've just never had anyone say anything so true to me like that. I guess is what it was. And one thing I left out...I'm a classic "avoider". That's how I deal with my problems. I just ignore it...walk away...what ever I have to do. Like in high school, this sweet boy liked me, and I like him until his stories got on my nerves and I just couldn't handle him anymore, so instead of being mature and talking with him about it...I just avoided his calls, and him in the halls, until he got the idea. Terrible. I don't know why I do it. But I do. It's a horrible horrible thing to do to people..and I just have to say again and again..thank you for opening my eyes and giving me the slap in the face I deserved. haha I am using my free time tomorrow to call all my grandparents...everyone in my family. I can get over my feelings of them abandoning me without abandoning them. Your words to Ludmila about her argument with her mother really touched me. When you said you stopped looking at your mom as your mother but as another woman. That hit me like a lightning bolt. You really have had your way with words with me. And I'm shaking and getting ready to cry, so I'll end now. But I just had to comment once more and thank you again. =]

XOXO, Savannah

Suzanne said...

Bindi...all the rest, but not Savannah. We love her no matter what!

bindhiya said...

Yes, Suzanne, I do too.
She has gone through so much in this young age...poor girl..as i reply to her
"You are special. Don't ever forget it! Never let yesterday's disappointments overshadow tomorrow's dreams.

"VALUE HAS A VALUE ONLY IF ITS VALUE IS VALUED"

that's all I can say.
love you
bindi

Suzanne said...

Savannah ~ hi baby. I can't believe you remember my worlds on Lud's blog. You have been here. You're around the same age you know and I think going though a lot of the same stuff. We all did, unless we were perfect! It's true, I came to know my mom the moment I stop thinking of her as my mom. She's actually a remarkable women. Frankly, any one who would birth and raise 9 kids has a story. I told her recently I was so grateful to be alive. She didn't do everything perfectly. In fact she failed miserable 90% of the time (in my view), but I'm here and so are all of the sisters and brothers I adore. So she did a lot of stuff right. I wanted her to know before she died. My mom and I have become pretty frank with one another, just because time is short and you never who will die first. I still think I'm thirty, but I'm nearly fifty. How time passes. Don't waste it sweetie. No really. Don't waste it on stupid stuff.

XO

'54Bomber said...

Hey Suzanne,
I was replying to you on my blog but lost the reply so i have hopped over to your blog.

You were asking about putting a "hit counter" on you blog.

You need to go this URL address:
http://www.freeweblogger.com/signup

Click on Sign up link
follow insructions and then copy and paste the resultant code to the:

"HTML/JavaScript" page element in your blog layout page and then add it to your blog.

I hope that this helps,
Bye for now,
Mark.

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