Monday, January 12, 2009

Newman would be proud of Mommy today/Newman would be disappointed in Mommy today...

I'm writing because I have to. Otherwise I think I'll go totally insane.

This is a photo of me going over the bridge at the state park as I'm leaving. Now imagine me coming into the park as I'm arriving. I've just come off the freeway, I'm coming from the left and making a right into the park. It's a blind turn as you come around the corner so speeding isn't an option because there are usually bicylists, joggers or homeless along the walkway and one has to be careful.

I was late to the park today. The latest I've ever been because I'm exhausted and have a horrible headache. Coping with the loss of Newman is horrid and I don't think I'm doing it well. I cried on the way to the park, so as I turned the corner I was surprised to see a guy on a bike in the middle of the road and nearly hit him. I slammed on my brakes and my horn. He turned around, saw me, but never moved. I had to drive into the opposite lane to go around him. It's a beautiful warm day and I had the windows down and told him "you're an idiot!"

I drove to my usual spot, got out and was preparing to feed the kitties when I saw him. He'd taken my road. He could have taken three other roads to the bike path, but he took mine. He wasn't a racer, just an average guy riding a bike for pleasure. As he came toward the car I yelled "Get the hell away from me. I could have killed you today because you are so irresponsible, just get the hell away from me." I was at the back of my car at that point and he stopped at the back of my car and said "Lady, you're a moron, you were speeding and you don't understand the rules of the State Park because if you did you'd know I have every right to be in the road." I wasn't speeding and told him "If you've ever come through this entrance with a car, you know it's impossible to speed coming off that turn so don't try to intimidate me, and no, you have absolutely no right to be in the center of the road and not move to the right when a car approaches. Get away from me. You're wrong and you know it, so just get the hell away from me." Keep in mind, this is just an average, attractive early 30 something year old coming to the park to enjoy a bike ride. He said "You are a stupid fucking bitch." I was in the trunk at the moment getting out my running shoes (because I wear my flip flops to the park) and just looked at the container of oil, the container of coolant, the bag with the battery cables, the rug, the plastic bag, my shoes, my socks and I felt salty tears flow out of my eyes. I tried to pause and compose myself before I turned to confront him. I saw Newman and he said "Mommy, I love you." I turned around and he was so close I didn't even have to move. I was crying and said "Get out of my face, how dare you." He didn't move. I took my right hand, pointed my right finger and jabbed it into his arm and said "GET. OUT. OF. MY. FACE." He replied "Now that's assault and battery, I'm going to have to call 911." I replied "No, that wasn't assault and battery, this is, and jabbed him harder. Now get the hell away and leave me alone." Instead he called 911.

The state park police arrived, then the state police then the local police. Yup, tons and tons of cars and trucks all surrounding my beautiful little black Mercedes and an asshole. I started to explain but the guy broke in with lies. I told the officer "You know what, there aren't enough hours in my day for this sort of crap, let him tell the story, I have kitties to feed and I'm late, whatever happens happens, I'll pay the fine." I was asked for my license, I replied "Don't arrest me, it's expired!" He took my license and said "Don't worry." I went back to the car and prepared to feed my kitties. I didn't listen or hear a thing because I didn't want to. Let him tell his story, the truth would prevail. As I was preparing for the kitties I realized some of my favorite people in the world were at the park. I hadn't noticed because I'd been dealing with an idiot. There is a local center for physically challenged youth who come to the park probably 3 times/week. They usually walk the bike path so are rarely sitting around at picnic tables, but there they were. I waved to everyone because we all know one another so well and they waved back. Then two bicylist stopped by to say hi because they were concerned I was being arrested for feeding kitties. The cops told them to move along, but they refused. We had a beautiful conversation about kitties they'd discovered on the new bike trail on the other side of the river and think need attention. When they left I put food near my physically challenged friend and an attendant approached me and said "Are you okay?" I replied "I don't know. That guy won't leave me alone and he called 911, but I have to feed the kitties, so that's what I'm doing." She gave me a hug and said "We love love you."

I went back to the car and another officer approached me. He said "We've been told you threw a punch that landed and we'll have to arrest you." I went insane. No really. I did. I ran to that little sissy and said "You MF how dare you lie about me. YOU TELL THEM THE TRUTH. THIS IS MY LIFE!!! I have cats to feed, a family at home, TELL THEM THE FUCKING TRUTH...THIS IS MY LIFE." I lunged at him. I admit it. I could have killed him with my bare hands. Honestly, I could. A stocky hispanic officer grabbed me in mid flight, twisted my hand and I knew I was is horrible trouble. I was escorted to the police vehicle and a camera was turned to record my every move. I didn't move. I simply buried my head in my hands and cried. I've never done anything wrong in my whole life and there I was in a cop car and knew that if things didn't work out was on my way to County Jail. I was asked:
"Are you on any meds?"
"Have you been on meds?"
What's wrong? Because your reaction was extreme? Has there been a death in the family?"
"Yes, we had to bury our kitty yesterday."
"Was he an old friend?"
"Well that could explain your reaction."
I replied,
"No, it can't. I'll tell you what caused this...I can't stand a lie. What that guy told you is a lie. I poked him. That's all I did. I would never hurt another living soul. I poked him very hard and told him to get away from me. That's all I did. Just get away from me. Why am I here? I don't belong here, please don't do this to me. Please. He said "I did this because you lunged at him and I had to protect him, that is my job." I said "Who's here to protect me?" He left the car and I buried my head in my hands and sobbed. I never felt so alone in my life. I really believe I was going to County Jail without feeding all the ferals and with everyone at home alone. I felt as if I was going to die. About a half hour later the door opened and I was told to get out. Then was told that I'd told the truth. The attendents who care for the phyically challenged saw the whole thing and came to my rescue. Said I'd only "poked" him and heard "get away from me." They saved me.

If they hadn't been there I'd be in County Jail right now. When I was told to "get out" I was also told I'd told the truth. I said "why would I lie?" What about the way I look makes you think I would lie? The officer said "There are always two sides to a story and we have to listen. Did we think you were lying? No, but we had to listen and when you lunged, we were concerned. But when X verified your story, we knew the truth."

I walked to X and gave him the biggest hug and he said in my ear, "We saw it and knew what was happening and we would never let that happen."

That in a nutshell is my park and all the people who grace it. They always resue me and I'm so grateful. I would never be able to do what I do without all of them. Life is so beautiful.

And yes, the guy on the bike was asked to leave and all the officers stayed to protect me while I fed the ferals. When I got back to the car we embrace, alot! One said the most beautiful thing, "To see you smile made it all worth it."

I'm still smiling because I'm so grateful for dear friends. This was a hard day, but life is beautiful. I know I'm here for a reason.

With much love to you all,

P.S. Yes, I will respond to all the comments down below. Thanks for taking the time to write.

P.P.S. While typing this the doorbell rang. UPS. Hunter (Rob) I love y0u and your family more than you know. What a beautiful, thoughtful, kind gift. I love you guys. REALLY, I DO!!! *Hangs head.*


hnter1018 said...

Good thing you had witnesses Suzanne. I can't believe that shithead called 911. Glad your not typing fromt he pokey. Hope you enjoy was just something small. When you wrote about your pink hat i got the idea then:)

® ♫ The Brit ♪ ® said...

Hi Suzanne,
My God what a terrible situation to be in! and all caused by a lying idiot! It was so great that you had friends there or else that idiot may have got you in so much trouble... I can't believe there are people who would just call 911 as soon as they get into any kind of argument! What happened to the normal thing of resolving the issue by apologizing?! I guess he was too much of a coward!
You've had such a terrible week and you didn't need this and I am so sorry to hear about it, but Thank God that good people came to your help and stuck up for you!

Keep well Suzanne, you're a wonderful strong woman! Sending you lots of hugs! X

Karen ^..^ said...

Thank God you had witnesses. The unmitigated arrogance of that twerp, to stand there and cause such a dangerous situation, causing you to swerve out of YOUR lane, to go around him, and then to follow you to your area and try to intimidate you. Too bad you didn't have a phone, you could have called first, he had no right to follow you, and he got exactly what he deserved. Bastard.

You poor thing. Emotions were running high as it was, you couldn't even feed your precious kitties in peace. I'm so sorry that happened, but look at the good that came of it. I do hope he never shows up there again, if he does, please call the police on him. Then go and get a restraining order on him. This guy sounds unbalanced, and could have been really dangerous.

You are a little spitfire, aren't you? LOL. No one better mess with you! Just please be careful.

Newman would be VERY proud of Mommy today. In spite of the extreme stress of the situation, you still put the well being of the kitties above your own. You are an angel, never forget that. You took care of those little babies that cannot take care of themselves, and then you dealt with an unimaginable situation.

You are a dear, dear woman. Be proud and hold your head up high. You came out of this alright because of the way you treat people, and that man has no clue how to be human, that lying sack of shit. Sorry, I'm being vulgar in your comments, but that man should seriously be ashamed of himself, first by trying to intimidate a woman who was clearly alone, and second by LYING. Ugh, what a prick.

I'm glad you are ok. Be good to you, ok?

Much love,

Suzanne said...

Thanks to all, especially Karen. Rob is a criminal defense lawyer and I know criminal defense. I now also know what it's like to be on the other side. Wrongly accused. I seriously thought I was going to the County Jail and die. No, I'm not kidding. Someone like me would never make it in County Jail. Never. My saving grace was my darling handicapped souls. I honestly believe I wouldn't be writing this without them. I love them so much and now realize how deeply they love me. My life at the park is a gift. Every day, no matter how difficult, I go and walk into what is. And exit with a smile. I'm a lucky woman.

Kookaburra said...

Hi Suzanne,
This is Joyful Jo here.
What a shame you had to put up with him. Looks likes he's the type who likes to cause trouble. It's a great feeling when other people speak up for you. You then realise people are there for you,and you are valued.I just looked at the blog page and i have been commenting on Mark's blog page. I can't be botherd switching users now.

Suzanne said...


You dear sweet soul. It arrived. It's glorious!!! WOW!!! I love my hat. It's too perfect. Everything is so beautiful. Thank you and your family for the most beautiful gift of all. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I love you so much.

XO Me! I love you.

Suzanne said...


Life is so odd, isn't it? I know. What an unusual day to wrap my brain around. He'll never understand the pain he caused. He'd not that smart. How sad. But the rest of us are here to heal the pain. And so it goes.

With love,

Megan said...

I dunno, Suz, I'm a little freaked out by this. I dunno. I have to go read it again...

kylie said...

you get into a lot of these scrapes, dont you?

take care, eh


By-tor said...

Suzanne...hang in there. Are you still up for my call tomorrow? Maybe it would be good to talk to a friend. Let me know, okay? If you're up for it, please email me your cell number.


Anonymous said...

Okay...that was me too.

By-tor is the Hubby's profile on Blogger. He started a blog eons ago but never did anything with it. I guess his name "By-tor" is reference to the band RUSH and some song they did. I don't know!!!

Anyway, this is my first week without a job (and a computer). The company I was working for gave me a computer but I had to turn it in last week and now I'm on the Hubby's Mac Book and all his crap is on here.

Okay, I'll shut up now. Let me know if you want me to call you tomorrow!!!!!

Queen Goob said...

All I have to say is Newman and I are sure glad the idiot on the bike didn't ry to mess with the ferals....there would have been more than just cops at the park.

It's all about Karma, baby.

p.s. Thank you friends at the park, for looking out for our Suz.

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